The Dewdrop Digest

The Dewdrop Digest
Connecting Children, Youth and Sangha
Clouds in Water Zen Center
Sunday, January 4, 2004

Happy New Year! A special welcome to new and visiting families!

This quarter, continuing the year's theme of "Peacemaking and the Four Noble Truths," we will focus on Wholesome Behavior in general, with an emphasis on "Heart-to-Heart Speech and Listening" (a.k.a., Right Speech). As one facet of Right Speech, teachers, parents, and students will be invited to practice Nonviolent Communication (NVC), an approach that invites us to restore the natural flow of compassion within and between ourselves.

Today's Dewdrop briefly summarizes - and unpacks the relationships between - our main teaching areas this quarter: Four Noble Truths, Wholesome Behavior, Right Speech and Peacemaking.

Please read "Nonviolent Communication: Beyond Judgment and Niceness" (attached) and do the home practice.

THE FOUR NOBLE TRUTHS (RE-ORDERED) FOR CHILDREN AND ADULTS
· Third Truth: Our natural state of being is peaceful and joyful, with a flow of compassion within ourselves and between all beings.
· First Truth: Sometimes peace is interrupted. We experience pain or dissatisfaction. This happens to all beings, all the time!
· Second Truth: Looking within, deeply, lovingly, and gently, we can touch our pain with compassion. We begin to see that the roots of our pain are within us, not outside us. Taking responsibility for our pain, we have the opportunity to heal it and return to peace.
· Fourth Truth: The Eightfold Path of Peace and Joy is the way of the peacemaker. The three main components are: Awareness, Wholesome Behavior, and Wisdom (realizing boundless openness, our non-separate, compassionately connected reality).


WHOLESOME BEHAVIOR
· The Wholesome Behavior elements of the Eightfold Path are Right Action, Right Speech and Right Livelihood.

· "Right" here means noble or complete. To many, "right" implies judgment and black-and-white thinking, inferring a "recipe approach" to living. To encourage choices based on awareness, discernment and values, we'll use descriptors in addition to "Right" such as "Peacemaking Action" and "Heart-to-Heart Speech and Listening".

· Right Action, or Peacemaking Action, generally means "practicing the precepts (Protect life, Act with generosity, Honor the boy and relationships, Speak lovingly and listen deeply, Consume mindfully). We will touch on Peacemaking Action this quarter, and will practice much more in the Spring.

· Right Speech, or Heart-to-Heart Speech and Listening, our particular focus for Winter Quarter, is embedded in Right Action as the Fourth Precept, "Speak lovingly and listen deeply" and also is named outright as Right Speech element of the Eightfold Path.

· Right Livelihood means earning a living in a way that upholds our values.


MAKING PEACE AND CONNECTING WITH RIGHT SPEECH
· The Buddha divides Right Speech into four components: abstaining from false speech, abstaining from slanderous speech, abstaining from harsh speech, and abstaining from idle chatter.

· Our focus for "Heart-to-Heart Speech and Listening":
1. A foundation of mindfulness: awareness of self and others
2. Loving Speech: Speaking words that are true, kind and helpful. This would include expressing (disclosing) what is true for us, taking responsibility for our feelings and needs (rather than blaming).
3. Deep Listening: Listening with awareness, openness and empathy

· Practicing Right Speech supports our path to Wisdom (realization), peace and freedom. Taking responsibility for our feelings and needs, we see more deeply into the how we cause our suffering. When our speech is truthful and connecting, we see more deeply into the true nature of a non-separate reality.

· Our language and culture present obstacles to connecting to ourselves and others. Our language (e.g., "You make me mad!") encourages us to see external factors as causes of our pain. Speaking and listening from the heart is a very direct path to connecting to ourselves and all beings. It is a wonderful (and challenging) path to peace and harmony in everyday life.

· We have the precious opportunity to help children develop habits of speech and thinking that will facilitate the natural flow of compassion to themselves and others. Wow! In class, we can model and teach kind speech and open-heated listening. AND please remember: As parents, we are our children's first teachers - so our own practice is a great gift to them. Please practice daily at home, using the suggestions accompanying the enclosed article on Nonviolent Communication.

Question, suggestion, problem? Contact Children's and Youth Practice Coordinator Katharine Krueger at 651.222.6968 x10 or at cp@cloudsinwater.org.


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